i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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