If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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