I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
