His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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