yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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