Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
