Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(317): View more from Indiana

So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?

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(314): View more from Missouri

So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?

(816): View more from Missouri

Most never. Some around 65.

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(630): View more from Illinois

wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?

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(949): View more from California

shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...

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These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
Read it at the TFLN blog
(303): View more from Colorado

you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..

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(517): View more from Michigan

My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough

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(859): View more from Kentucky

i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly

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(404): View more from Georgia

yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants

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(224): View more from Illinois

We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.

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