How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
You took a bar mat shot.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
