new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
