I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
