this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
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