I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
My ATM looks so different sober.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
