this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
