she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
