Screwed.edu
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
the raccoons are back...
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