don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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