Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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