Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize