i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize