Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
