i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize