playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
