Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
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We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
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I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.