And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.