Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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