I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
