8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
