Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
It's like God shit irony all over that family
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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