It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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