we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
