Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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