Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
false alarm, still single
Randomize
