I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
