I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
