is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize