Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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