In the future we'll all be gay
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
