My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
