im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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