Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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