Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
