drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
