I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
