It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
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