they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
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