I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
