he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slut skills are useful in every country.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize