puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize