You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
