i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
