If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
