it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
you mean i was at the winter classic?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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